I came here today because someone told me the measurements here were off, and baby, that just wouldn't do. I think it might have been Richard… Probably just wants me out of the house so he can listen to Severina Vučković full blast, like back in ‘04… 🥲 But I knew I had to get my hands on this.
I rode on the pleasure train, stepping off at Liverpool, just like Bridget Jones, ready for some serious penetration… of the metrical variety! I had been edging myself the whole train ride, just thinking about running my hands all over this place, exploring every inch.
As soon as I walked in, I knew something was off, I had left my Britney Spears CD at home. But there was no turning back now, I had to finish measuring this sacred premises before closing. I’ll just have to hum “Hit Me Baby One More Time” whilst I’m measuring. That song always gets me hard and keeps my hands steady. I cannot afford to be even one millimetre off, not when the stakes are this high… the stakes have never been so high!
Once I finished measuring the premises I knew it was safe to eat here, the measurements were perfectly inline with “Bridget Jones’s Diary”, I could relax and let loose. I immediately started munching on that succulent chicken… the juices were flowing, and I couldn't help but let out a little moan as the flavours exploded in my mouth. I sucked every last bit of meat off the bone, making sure not to miss a single spot. The skin was crispy and salty, and the meat was so tender it practically melted in my mouth. Each bite was pure ecstasy, and I savoured every moment like it was my last.
I’m going to rate this place quickly because I need to get home in time for my date with Pamela Anderson, I’m not joking. She is waiting for me… 🥲 I can't wait to feel her perfect circumference…
5 stars! The dimensions of this building and the chicken sold here were perfectly inline with “Bridget Jones’s Diary”. I’m tearing up just thinking about how perfect this place is while I’m in the train on my way to Pamela… 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
